AN ARTIST'S Modest Self-Projection in CHANGING TIMES

subtitle: "Shuffle Your Blocks"

We live in an emergent, bite-size culture.  It's everywhere and nowhere, like so many journeys reduced to first steps.  Like salsa-dancing instead of climbing a mountain.  Except at least with salsa-dancing, there is a rhythm.  It may be repetitive, annoying even, but it is predictable enough to dance.  To make something beautiful out of something familiar.

We're all artists in our own minds.  ADMIT IT!  Okay, I am a self-described creative person, addicted to the kind of behavior that is self-congratulatory in the habit of making things.  From scratch!  But I'm also a fan.  In fact I'd go so far as to say there is nothing that I enjoy creating, be it art, music, writing, cooking... there's pretty much nothing I would make that I wouldn't be happy about someone else making for me.  (just as long as I could keep on going making stuff.  I do enjoy the process as well as the product...)  Really!  I believe that I like my stuff, my style, even before I make it... so if someone did that for me, I would have to thank them!  I believe I would even welcome my doppelganger-from-the-future in this impossible scenario... wouldn't you? 

Anyways, this is a good thing and a bad thing.  It's good because it means I am genuine with my style, my taste, my desire for beauty and fulfillment in various forms.  But the bad side that I may have to live with is - not everyone likes what I like.  I began by (with guidance and encouragement) making things for myself ... and then showing my family and friends and trying to get some amount of approval, or even (gasp) appreciation.  But how can I expect people to love what I do if I am just doing things for myself first and foremost.  But, but - how am I supposed to do things for other people?  Who are these other people, what are they like?  What do THEY like?  What could you make and give to someone or some audience/demographic/community... that would be surprising and satisfying.  Like, healing or inspiring or filling some hole that they didn't know they had.  Isn't that what art (in general, not just visual) does for us?  I should know, I'm a big fan... somehow... a guilty addict to the forms themselves, the material, the message (and the meaning... and maybe even the source...?  <welp> )

And maybe the gift would be given anonymously, you know like Amelie <starry-eyes>... cuz there's nothing quite like getting a gift from "the universe" (I know you're out there!  Thank you whoever you are!!)

But then, how are you going to open up the lines of communication and create a movement, a collective, a common understanding and a popular celebration... or whatever... if you rely on anonymity.  I think this is the secret wish of every artist.  Maybe they are like me, and they would be thrilled if someone else made the thing that they wish THEY had made.  (How did you know?!) but if it doesn't yet exist, out there somewhere, as far as you know... and you want it to exist... yes, maybe it is up to you to be the brave artist and make it happen somehow.  When that becomes possible.  This is the biggest joy of any artist... that moment when you believe you can do it... when a felt sense becomes a dream or a vision or even a download... like the waterfall at the end of the river... like you almost already HAVE the treasure map.

Yeah, that's a good feeling.  Right artists?  Of course, some never even get there.  And that doesn't mean there aren't satisfying watersheds to the creative process.  That moment when... you get the idea of what you're making for dinner and you start to wonder if you don't already have ALL OF THE INGREDIENTS!  Or maybe you just need to go out and get one or two things.

Imagine if you could take your refridgerator magnet set... yeah, the one that's sprawling chaotically all over your fridge.  Imagine you could press the "shuffle" button... or the "reset" button.  Cuz they are pretty much the same thing.  Well?  Ya know.  Go with me on this one... A word is a word is a word, and if it's not yet poem or prose, it is a "word" - it is... in theory... the same word, spelled the same way, and meaning the same thing - concensus to everyone together, and unchanged when passed to each and every undivided individual (in most cultures)   hahaha but how frustrating (and unrealistic) this limitation must be to poets... to follow the tyranny of the cloned and drone-like dictionary.
I am not so much a poet.  But I am an artist!  Of sorts.  And I know that a creative limitation is a door that's begging to be opened, if you could just get the two dozen bolts and chains and latches off first.  Uggh so much fun.  One step at a time!!

HOWEVER...  there is also an otherworldy and inexpressible gratitude for the words and colors and chords and spices that DO exist.  Couldn't imagine a world without the building blocks.  If you ever have writer's block... as an artist of any kind... it never hurts to go back to basics.  (what?  writer's block?  Is that some kind of lego or video game paraphernelia?)

So I guess the first "shuffle" function I had was just that.  It happened at the end of every play-day.  Tear down your buildings and castles, and put all the blocks back in their bin.  And mix 'em around.  They will all be there in the morning.  Somewhere.

***

Here's the problem again.  Re-stated.  Language, in all of its well-intentioned idealism, language or verbal communication pursuades us to follow a set of established rules.  Some of the rules are so fundamental that you can travel the world from coast-to-coast and assume that everyone will follow the same ones.  A sentence is made of a noun and a verb.  The letter "s" or "es" makes things plural.  The word "word" is spelled "W-O-R-D".  It's a really nice thing, that we all have that "starter set"  that kit that includes everything you need to create a comfortable life in organized society.  If you want, you can take that high-school diploma and create a permanent and functioning life exchange currency for goods and services, working 9-5 Mon thru Fri and having the weekends to relax and do whatever you want.  But...what...do...you... "want" ?

So here's the thing.  Language, communication, universally institutionalized and standardized communication... they try in their own way to make the system perfect.  As perfect as humanly possible, at least for the masses.  In their American equality: the "melting pot" that both celebrates diversity... and also strives for a kind of unity.  But the world is far from perfect.  And so neither is language... or the people who write and speak it.  (haha particularly American English haha - the conglomerate of a history of conquered or assimilated strands and frays)  ...and it is always growing and changing.  "The" language, that is.  There must be hundreds of new words in the dictionary every year.  But what's a dictionary?!  "I use the UXB app on my phone"... (good for you, I guess I should know what that is)  "now, now"  (haha)

Even the highest education in the land is imperfect... not by-itself adapted to providing you with everything you need to adjust to a changing future.  Good, right?  If everything stayed the same it would be boring and tedious.  Yes but if it changes too fast, and you still rely on outdated systems, you might get ostracized and quarentined at best.  You and your world are at risk of becoming obselete.  Is that because of the new technology always changing things?  Well yes and no.  People drive technology.  It wouldn't even evolve or improve... if there weren't bored and restless ingenues driving cultural evolution.  Growth, change, transformation - you thought your life was set-and-done when you graduated, didn't you?  Sorry!  You don't have to retire into a life of half-pleasant monotony.  (I don't?!)

If you don't want to.  Really it's up to you.  If you want to relax and ride a steady slow-grazing current of easier-listening slow jazz and frozen yogurt wave pools - go for it!  Or say you want to binge watch the nail-biting seven-season psychological thriller from saturday morning to sunday night - you can do that instead!  Or do both!!  

But.  I still have the starter-set to a life that you can personally build and shape into something cool and engaging, that I myself OWN.  So... why are there vague distractions made of these undeveloped conceptual raw materials everywhere in the world, while "the we" in our institutionally brainwashed accuracy go around trying to clean-up and re-organize and settle?  What are we so settled about... why... settle?

***